But no, after a while it really is nice to see the heralding signs of spring. All that green stuff getting greener and demanding to be raked, aerated, fertilized, trimmed, swept, cut, edged... Geez! I miss winter!

Besides, I'm not a big fan of the winter sceneries. All gray and drab and just generally looking all cold and nasty. I'm likely missing out on some terrific scenery, but as a rule, I tend to fly in summer daylight hours. Sometimes if I'm feeling particularly bold, I'll start at dawn and fly east to watch the sunrise, or west in the evening to catch the sunset. Just an old FSRomantic, I guess.

But what of this change of seasons? How is it affecting your simming, fellow sky pilots? Here in the northeast, we are finally enjoying some delightful spring weather, and I am really torn between taking my PIC ERJ for a spin, or doing something outdoors. I suspect that by mid-June, all of the dedicated sim pilots will be easily identifiable by our pasty complexions and aversion to sunlight.

This change of season thing, I am deciding, has the very serious potential to put a crimp in our flight hours. And it's not just because it's nice outside, either. I actually *gasp* fired up one of my shooters the other night. Fun, but I found it not unlike being a dermatologist. With 300 skin diseases and three creams, where's the challenge? With the shooters, you point and click. Heck, with FlightSim, we really invest some mental power trying to recall flows and procedures. Sure, the click is there, but it is secondary to our task at hand.

See what I mean? This spring stuff has really gotten my knickers in a twist. I'm ranting on about what I wish to be doing, not having the first clue what it may be, but yet here I remain in front of this monitor, basking in the glow of LCD pixel-light, while the rest of the Northeast is outside washing cars or tossing a Frisbee around. I actually did invest some moments in consideration of a car washing... Happily, the moment passed.

I'd like to pause for a moment for an observation. True, I may be sitting here tippity-tapping away on the keyboard, but you, my fine FSPilot, are also just sitting, and reading. This is not necessarily a bad thing, particularly as were you not, I'd probably be outside washing the damn car. But geez, it's nice out, folks! Hurry up with the article, think well-wishes to the author, perhaps send along a dollar or two (to be deposited into the "New Computer with all the Bells and Whistles" fund, I assure you), then go grab your Frisbee and flail away!

Here's a little something for ya: FeelThere/Wilco has just released their latest bird, the Citation X. I couldn't mention that before now, otherwise I'd get yelled at. But it's OK now, 'cause it's been revealed on the Wilco site. Anyhoo, the manual was done by none other than your humble narrator. Now, I've a purpose in mind, in the way I put it together. For one, it's certain to annoy those "serious" simmers who feel the need to pass a qualification exam on said bird. For another, I truly believe it's time for we of the "Middle Class" of Flight Simming to have manuals directed towards us. I'd like for once to see a sim released with a "plain language" manual, filled not with esoterica about hydraulic pressure and fuel temperature parameters, but an old fashioned "How To Fly This Thing Before You Become Frustrated And Forget You Ever Bought It" type of manual. Do you remember the ATR 72-500? I devoted nearly an entire ream of copy paper and a couple of printer cartridges to that bird. I bought it when it first came out, and you know how long ago that was. Well, I still can't fly that friggin' bird. Sure, I can get her in the air and down again, but I don't really have a clue as to what it is I'm supposed to be doing. I have finally gotten a handle on the ubiquitous Prop Brake, and know that said brake is employed to use engine 2 as an ersatz APU. Beyond that, I'm still removing limbs from the ground crew, and giving "Lefty" some competition in his one-handed lacrosse games.

But here's an idea. What with the renewal of spring, how's about we all dust off some of our sims that have been sitting idle in our hangars, and give them another go? I'll make you a deal: I'll devote some of the following fair weather weekends to mastering this ATR nemesis of mine, if you'll make a similar effort. No fair choosing a default bird! I do like to go back to my roots every now and again and take one or two of them out for a spin, but c'mon girls and boys, one of the purposes of any hobby is to gain a certain degree of expertise and mastery over certain subjects. In that regard, for those of us who are crusty old-timers, excessive time spent with the defaults is approaching the realm of mental masturbation (can I write that, Nels?)... feels good but really is pointless in the end. Sort of gives new meaning to calling an FSPilot a jerk, doesn't it? (Sorry, it must be the weather change...) No, let's either cut the lawn or renew our relationship with a SuperSim, and get on out there and give it the good old college try! Rah, Rah, sis-boom--- boy, that college set can be annoying.

Hey, something cool happened the other day. It seems the I.T. guy in my office is a flight simmer! Not only that, but he's got his PPL with about 900 hours. Nirvana! I've finally found someone as sick as I am that is on the same side of the screen as me!

So anyway, get off your duff, turn off the monitor and find something productive to do. Me, I think I'll clean the gutters and then wash the car. Or, maybe I'll finally sand the rust off the top of said van, mask it from the top down and spray the top flat black with rust stop. Perhaps cut the lawn, trim the hedges and turn over the dirt in the garden...

You know, I really think I'm liking the prospect of fall and the heralding of colder weather...

Three Green!

Chip Barber
rfbarber2@verizon.net